Brian takes Stewie's Adderall in hope of finishing a 2000-page proposal to give to an author at a book convention; Quagmire and Peter have a cooking competition.
For Father's Day, the guys search for Joe's estranged father; Peter pretends to be Joe after learning that Joe's father is intolerant of people with disabilities; Stewie learns that he will only be 5 feet 1 inch tall.
Brian's jokes cause a fight with Stewie, prompting Stewie to build a robot friend; Lois wants a new mattress.
When the guys go to an abandoned asylum to gain inspiration for a new horror movie, they accidentally kill a man who they think is keeping them hostage; annoyed with Brian's perceived pretension, Stewie endeavors to destroy his glasses.
When Peter goes to his mother's home to retrieve his stash of porn, he finds a "To Peter From Peter" tape that makes him feel like a failure.
When Peter's sister, Karen (Kate McKinnon), visits for Thanksgiving, she acts like a bully; Brian and Stewie go on a cleanse.
Quagmire admits that he has feelings for Lois after accidentally calling Peter; Brian tries to fix the situation.
The guys find Joe too difficult to be around when he is trampled by bulls and becomes a quadriplegic; when the husband of the woman Brian is sleeping with returns home, he pretends to be the family's new dog.
While participating in a newly formed neighborhood watch group, Peter is arrested and charged with a hate crime.
When the guys travel to Korea to retrieve the final episode of an Asian soap that Quagmire starred in, Quagmire is reunited with a former lover; Stewie is concerned that he will be a redhead.
Lois and Peter become crazy show-business parents when Stewie is cast in a peanut butter commercial and starts earning money for the family.
While Lois and her mother are away at the spa, Peter and Carter fall for an email scam and go to Africa to recover their money; Brian is interested in Meg's friend, Patty.
After Peter overloads his old cellphone with mobile apps, he buys a replacement and gives his old cellphone to Chris, which triggers a series of terrible events; Stewie joins a tennis club and asks Brian to be his partner.
When Mayor West raises the drinking age to 50, Brian -- thanks to dog years -- is the only one old enough to buy alcohol for Peter.
Peter turns the attic into a man cave, which makes Lois furious; Brian builds a device to help Stewie conquer his terrifying nightmares.
Chris wants in on the heist when he finds out that Meg is stealing from residents at a retirement community; the residents catch Chris and Meg and force them to listen to boring stories.
When Lois becomes a postal worker to pay for Stewie's private school, she finds an unsent letter from Peter that was meant for his old fling.
Peter is lost in a mall overnight after his family abandons him; to win over a girl, Brian pretends he's a millionaire.
When Chris becomes homecoming king, Meg learns that the cool kids plan to prank him during the homecoming ceremony; Peter and the guys try to replace Cleveland.